In my late 20s and new in town, I’m completing the obligatory first-timers paperwork in a doctor’s office. I circle yes or no to the usual questions, turn in the clipboard and return to my seat.

After a minute or so, I am asked to approach the reception desk.

I circled ‘yes’ after “have you had implants?” and added “1990-2003” on paper.

Those scrub diva’s wanted answers.

With a shrug of my shoulders, and a pat on my back for honesty, I said, “the novelty wore off and I was pretty much done with them.”

I suddenly witness simultaneous head-tilt-with-a-smile faces on four medical assistants.

I can’t remember what happened newt, but eventually, it was concluded that I misunderstood the questions and we all shared a room full of laughter.

The doctor I was visiting was a dentist.

9 thoughts on “Implants

  1. omg.. that was so funny! Speaking of Dentists… here's a joke for you: I'm scared to death of the dentist.. I mean really petrified!!! One day while sitting in the chair.. white knuckling the arm rests of course.. hyperventilating.. the Dentist said.. "Are you going to be alright?". I replied, "I don't know Doc, I really hate going to the dentist.. this stuff scares me to death.. I'd really rather have a baby than this dental work!".. He looked at me with a really straight face and said… "WELL MAKE UP YOUR MIND.. I HAVE TO ADJUST THE CHAIR."(that cracked me up so much.. that I laughed so hard I was no longer scared, and all went well)


  2. hahaha You can't help but laugh at yourself when things like that happen. And thank you for sharing it with the rest of us so we can all laugh with you.


  3. THAT is about the funniest thing I've read all month. I can't wait for people to wake up (it's early!) so I can share that with them!Thanks for the laugh.I'll be back.I'll remember to put my coffee DOWN next time before opening your page. I practically drenched my laptop when I spewed.:-)


  4. @ScoMan Thank you – I agree! When you laugh at yourself, the world laughs with you! @f8hasit I love that you came by and commented — and best of all, you enjoyed! I have so many of these embarrassing stories, I'm happy to share!


  5. What a funny post! As a post transition trans woman, I've grown to accept my slightly less than C cup breasts, and I've felt the temptation to go with implants. So many friends seek breast augmentation and I think it is a large part of our identity as women. However I'm learning to love me for me, and though I might be small, they're mine all mine 🙂


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