Selfish Selflessness


Think of your children. If you don’t have your own, but lucky enough to have little ones in your life like me, think of them.

Think of them coming to you for help. Their little eyes tearing up, staring at you for love and support.

Perhaps there is trouble in school with a bully or they lost a soccer game. Maybe their fragile heart is broken for the first time or…maybe they just feel blue.

Whatever the hurt, you are unconditionally there for your kids with unwavering support. You hold them close and let them cry. The encouragement and love you provide wraps their little hearts like cashmere by the fire. There is no safer place than your arms.

No matter what your kids’ ages, they will always be your babies.

So tell me – What stops you from being there for yourself?

When you don’t get the promotion, a friend moves away or get your heart-broken for the millionth time; remember you have your own arms.

Provide the same care to your inner child as you do to your babies and the example you make will last a lifetime.

“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection” – Buddha

24 thoughts on “Selfish Selflessness

  1. Thank you. I think, as women, especially as mothers, we think of ourselves last, physically and mentally. I have tried in the last few years to make an effort to take care of myself. Sometimes I do a good job, other times, not so much. It is innate in us, this prioritizing ourselves last. I'll try harder.


  2. A lot of people, and especially women and mothers, have a natural tendency to nurture and take care of others. They focus on the needs of the people in their lives before their own. Sometimes they need to see or hear this for it to hit home.


  3. Hi,Visiting from SITS. Interesting blog and posts. I will come back later to read more. My computer is on the fritz. Take care!Anne-Marie


  4. OH my goodness, I swear I didn't read this post BEFORE I wrote my own today! Wow, what a parallel for me to have that experience with my son and then to read this post. You're right, it IS about taking care of ourselves. How then could we take care of others if it were not the case?


  5. @Matty – Add co-dependents in to that mix and you have me. It's something I aspire to do: giving myself back the same love as I provide to others. God, that sounded vain. Not intended to. Wait. Is that co-dependent to say that? I'm a work in progress, that is for sure. @RJ – Scorpio, man. You inspire. 🙂 @A2Z – Thanks for stopping by and can't wait to learn more about you! Your page is fun!@sweetjeanete – Fellow SITSer! Love you! Happy Happy Happy birthday. You are so welcome. @LoriD – I was thinking the same thing after reading your blog. Great minds. :)@Gillian – I know what you mean, but when you wrap that love around yourself, the reward is overflowing unto others…. it just may take time to get used to it. 🙂


  6. This is so touching. A bit different for men maybe though. If I do something I don't like I just push it down and try not to think of it anymore. I strangle my bad thoughts and bury them in the desert rather than actually healing my mind.


  7. What a thoughtful and thought-provoking post.I'm visiting from SITS.I have your book bookmarked (hmmm….odd sentence) to read when I have a few moments. It looks intriquing.


  8. @Kimberly – Blogging is a great "Me Time" activity. Plus, you meet so many amazing people. :)@Secretia – So true…@Christopher – I tend to do that too sometimes. A good walk on the beach helps me. @Jenny – Thanks Jenny and great to meet you! I'm off to read you now…:)


  9. I think balance is the key.Giving to others is not the problem.The problem is giving everything to others and not giving to the person in the mirror as well.I once new a very intelligent old man who worked part time as a security officer. When I saw how intelligent he was I was shocked to find him working at such a low paying job.I would later discover he had cancer and had once owned a multimillion dollar company which ended up going bankrupt.He wound up losing everything not because of bad investments but because he never put any money away for himself and put every extra nickel into his company.I thought it was so sad to listen to this man's story.From this conversation, I learned a valuable lesson though.Time can never be bought back. Often times, to try to seek wealth is to also become diseased with the "enough is never enough" syndrome.There are a lot of people who are poor and yet they are still wealthy in other ways. It is a shame so many never put value on things without judging with their eyes first.I don't believe inner peace really ever occurs when one lives their life worshiping false idols.


  10. Man, have you been reading MY mind lately… that's what I've been doing over and over and over… I go to no ends for my kids… or my friends… or family… yet, I kick myself to the curb… after the death of my Dad died and during my divorce, I was seeing a counselor… she asked me over and over and over… 'Shoes… you are so good to so many others… why don't you take care of you???' And I still don't have an answer… :o(I always think of myself last… I think its part of being a "caretaker"… you know?~shoes~


  11. Thanks for taking the time to read and comment ~ wow! I love these. :)@Shoes – Think of it this way. When you are on an airplane and the flight attendant reviews the emergecy procedures, the first thing they tell you do to is put on YOUR oxygen mask. After you take care of YOU, you have the ability to take care of others. 🙂


  12. One does have to make oneself a priority. That is one of the most important things. Living for others is real admireble and all but what picture are you sending out to the world, to your loved ones? Do you want them to live the same life?Very interesting!Oh and I'm your 100 follower here, yay for you!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s