I’ve been reading more and more how social networking sites are being labeled as breeding grounds for infidelity. There is a great article about it on CNN HERE.
Although I think sites like Facebook can lead people to re-connect with old flames, I still believe that if someone is going to cheat, they will find a way – internet or not.
I don’t judge anyone. I have been on both sides of the cheating spectrum and every person has a story. That said, it’s hard for me to think that Facebook can be completely responsible for breaking up relationships. That seems a little too easy.

What do you think?  Do you have any stories?

19 comments

  1. I remember a Chris Rock standup special where he said men are as faithful as their options. I think there is something to that in the whole facebook infidelity debate. It opens up some more options for people to get a little action on the side. Blaming facebook is just silly. Facebook didn't make you call her, facebook didn't make you meet her at some dingy motel and facebook didn't make you whip it out. Facebook just gave you a place to talk to her and made it easier for you to approach her without getting caught.

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  2. Blaming FaceBook for infidelity is similar to me blaming Beer Makers for may alcoholism…which is ridiculous. I have the problem..not the booze, it is just liquid in a glass until I do something with it…I think people look for a reason to deflect responsibility and blame anyone BUT themselves. Yes, Social Networks make it easier for people to communicate these days but it is still people who go and make the actual connection. Did people blame the Alexander Graham Bell/Telephone when it came into being since people could then call each other and "hook up" long distance?! I couldn't agree w/Christopher more..

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  3. Thanks for the input Thormoo – I agree. It's interesting how the connection is made though: easy access + fantasy = infidelity. Sometimes. I love your analogy with the booze. So true – I feel the same way about the drug use in my past. It's refreshing to hear people take responsibility. 🙂

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  4. Christine, it's funny when I was reading your reply about how it's refreshing when people take responsibility it struck me as kind of sad in a way. Because it does seem like the "norm" nowadays is to just give in to it….whatever "it" is: Infidelity, dishonesty, lying, cheating…whatever. And just act like: "well everyone else does it plus I'll never get caught…" It is really a cop out.I'm beginning to think people sell themselves short, they need to realize that:…"Hey,we can be honest, we can be faithful…etc". Believe me, I am FAR FAR FAR away from being anywhere CLOSE to perfect but it almost seems like some folks don't even bother to try to live lives of integrity anymore…that is what I really find most disturbing.Perhaps because you and I both have lived lives that crossed into the darker side of life, that has given us a different perspective. You've changed as a person, I've changed as a person, it wasn't easy but we did it and we know that it can be done…I just hope folks realize that hey, they can change the kind of lives they live…if they want to. They don't need to do these things….Life is much cooler and way more enjoyable for me w/out the drink or drugs. But at one time I couldn't even begin to see that…Perhaps I've really scooted (WAY) off track here but that subject of online affairs and such stuff really disturbs me. Thanks for the post…

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  5. Man, we're all so worried about being cheated on! I agree, Christine, people have been cheating since they were living in caves and didn't need Facebook to do it. Sure, it's easier to spark and carry on an affair when you've got all these secret communication methods (thank God your wife will never pick up the land line when your mistress calls, now that you've got a cell.) But if your partner is drawn to another person so powerfully enough it destroys your marriage, I doubt Facebook really had anything to do with it.

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  6. I agree that we need to stop making excuses for people making mistakes. In most cases, if someone is going to cheat or kill someone or whatever it is…they're going to do it. Blaming computers, social networking, video games, violent movies, etc….is just that: blaming.

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  7. I'm pretty much going to agree with what everyone else is saying. If you're gonna cheat, you're gonna cheat. Sure FB makes it easier to connect, but the possibility is always there. I know that I've had several guys from back in the old days get at me trying to hang out and they're married. Innocent? Maybe, but probably not….. I'll stick to the ones without attachments…

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  8. I agree with you Christine; if someone wants to cheat, they will find a way.I think it TOTALLY boils down to no one needing/wanting/having to take responsibility for anything they do. Instead its Facebook that is to blame, media that is to blame, money that is to blame. It couldn't simply be bad behavior. Amazing yes?

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  9. I agree with you Christine.As a daughter of a constant cheat and compulsive liar of a father, I know that if someone is going to cheat, they will with or without the internet. Just because some use the internet as a tool to cheat, it does not mean the blame should be put on the sites. It's someone's choice to use it as a tool or not, just the same as it is someone's choice to cheat.

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  10. Definitely not facebook's fault, however it does make cheating easier. I know a girl who got onto facebook while she was in an "altered" state and ended up cheating on her husband (an old BF she was chatting with came over) the same night she was chatting with this guy.She didn't even remember it.

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  11. Everyone wants attention, I suppose it's up to the individual where they draw the line. If you want to cheat, no social network is necessary. :)The blame game will never end though.

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